chair just chillen bein all dead and stuff


Chair is the seat used by Ryan Chavez when he records all albums for his 1980s mathcore band,8! FOLD! PATH! . Growing up as a young christian scientist Chavez did not have many friends due to his eccentric beliefs of peace and equality. Chavez became very close friends with his chair he recieved in 1981. He wished that he would get a chair from santa in which he can belove(wishing is a common christian scientist custum) and he did which strengthened his belief in the christian faith. However an experience changed him for ever. A christian Scientist priest in his native town in costa rica beat him with a scooba diving outfit. Chair came to Ryan's rescue and convinced him to run for office. Ryan was reluctant to do so because of the strong sense of no children in the American Government, however chair was persistent and reassuring. Chavez ran in 1983 at the age of 4.

The election of 1983

Chair became Ryan's top advicer as he ran for prime minister of costa rice.(even personal matters such as his love life and pancakes) Chavez ran against beloved christian scientist J. Peterman(who later became dictator and fasion expert)Chavez knew competition was tense but hchair had a plan. The gays. The only people that did not support Peterman were the strange middle class gays because of Petermans "strange middle class gays embargo act" which prohibited any importing of strange middle class gays for the strange middle class gays in costa rica to love. Chavez and chair decided to go to nuork, which was a gay neighborhood west of cherrybong. The gays were not easily swayn however after time chair pulled through. the reason that they were reluctant to vote is because of the massive drug empire built up by the corrupt Peterman. Chair was shot after disobeying Peterman and Ryan took office in 1984 after the death of a dear friend. However when word got out that Chavez was also the infamous pimp Marcilious, people used the anti-4 year old act on him and peterman assumed office.


Although chair was now a cadaver, Chavez honered his body by using it as a seat for his recording. This lead to the revolution of chairs where no chair body will be burned after death but will be used as seating and ultimately fulfill their purpose in this world.